I overhear some amazing conversations in first grade. Here are a few snippets:
Hanukkah is a holiday they celebrate in the NFC East
Me: What will you ask Santa for, for Christmas? Student: Fake grass for my backyard.
Student 1: What's the Mississippi River? Student 2: It's a river with lots of sharks in it. Student 3: Dude, it's a river in Mississippi. "My tummy feels like it's ready to spread it's wings." "My mom's favorite animal is babies."
"I'm going to be a girl that shoots blazers out of her eyes."
"I like Mrs. Branciforte way better than Rice Krispies."
Me: How do you spell 'Look?' Student: line-o-o-k Me: Don't you mean 'l?'"
"August is the best holiday because you can jump into leaf piles."
Me: What's something that makes a mammal a mammal? Student: They don't lay eggs. Me: How do mammals have babies? Student: The egg cracks open in their tummy, then comes out.
"I want to be a fluffy rabbit and we can be friends."
"I know the words for 'yes' and 'no' in dog language."
Me: Hippos weigh between 2 and 3 tons. That's as big as a car! Student: Wow. My mom weighs 1 ton, so that is way bigger.
"Did you know that coloring is my life?"
Those poor Giants. They did all that hard work, and now their parade is in the rain.
Nobody tricks or treats on my street because my street only has a bunch of old people on it.
Is that gluten free? Because gluten free is actually gooder.
Can women grow beards?
I was born on my birthday. Everyone gets born on their birthday.
Me: What comes at the end of a sentence: Student: A pyramid!
Me: How many uppercase letters do you use when you’re writing your name? Student: One, unless you’re LeBron James.